Hi all my avid (vanished) readers.

I suppose I need only blame myself fo no one calling in anymore, since it has been absolutely eon since I posted anything here.

I must beg your forgiveness. The past year or so has not been an easy one. I have been divorced, repartnered, had a committment ceremony, moved to a new address, left my job, diagnosed with a birth defect at 42 years of age and just basically too tired, depressed, sick and busy to bother posting on this blog.

So, that's just to bring you up to speed and let you know I am alive.

What am I doing? Well at present, I am editing my finally finished novel If Sinners Entice, prior to getting it out and about to publishers, or just hanging it all and self publishing it.

I am also working to finish another novel under my pseudonym, Kalita Kasar.

Be on the lookout for news on the publishing front later this year.

I will try not to be such a stranger from now on!

Blessings,
Meg

I was always of the thought that anencephaly is universally mortal.

It seems it is not, since some brainless idiots still seem to be animate enough to at least persist in posting spam on my comments section.

Geeze people grow a brain, or do the gene pool a favour by committing an act worthy of the annual darwin award and thus removing your particular strain of idiocy from the genome.

 

*sighs*

I am one step away from disallowing comments altogether.

M

You will no longer be able to frolic in your anencephalic bliss upon these pages.

No more will your useless products be promoted instantly from this portal.

No longer will your dimwitted drivel befoul this air.

Begone! Your spam will never see light of day within these walls

For the almighty approval button must first be pressed

and with my approval such foul ravings shall ne'er be blest!

forsooth!

 

It is early evening and I have not long since arrived home from the supermarket where I bought chuck steak, and ingredients to make a mild curry. I am cooking it now with some rice and while saucepans simmer on the stove with the makings of my dinner inside, thoughts now simmer inside my mind, melting down, circulating, blending and creating new flavours, new directions, new goals and aspirations. My hiatus has been good for my soul; good for my spirit.

I have spent time listening to gospel music, revisting some of the old favourites I used to sing with my aunt and with the choirs I have joined my voice with in times gone by, and learning some new songs of adoration on a CD I ordered a few weeks ago.

I have spent time in the company of friends, and with my children and with God. I have worked on my writing, I have allowed myself time to dream again.

Many things have come bubbling to the surface in this time, and the most important one is something I had purposed to do when I left my husband almost 6 months ago.

I had big dreams, back then. Big ambitions, and the world seemed to unfold before me with a golden glow of promise.

Then, April came, and with it, the death of my dearest aunt. The golden glow was shrouded in a dark pall of grief, and I lost sight of the things I had purposed to do. With the grief came a very draining spate of illness, partly because I was not taking proper care of myself, and partly because I had developed this new fangled syndrome they call PMR.

Now, with the illness finally controlled by medicine, and the hurts of recent times gradually fading to more tolerable levels, l'm looking again for that golden glow I so briefly glimpsed all those months ago and it is something that is calling to me, and drawing me, and which I feel I need to give myself to in order to heal and recoup my spirit.

That Golden glow involves my writing, my faith in God, and my children, and those are the things I want most to give myself to.

As of next month, I will be moving back home with my children, and although my marriage to my husband is over (he will be moving out), my life is only now starting to unfold into all that I believe I glimpsed those months ago. I will be going back to church, getting back to my writing, perhaps I will join a choir or just sing for myself and for God's pleasure.

I realize this may not make sense to a lot of people, but it makes sense to me. It is what I desire and where I want to be and there is no way I could, or would try to make it make sense to anyone else.

For now, I am a single, writing, singing, praising mum and I am gonna love every minute of it!

"And all I do

Is live my life for you!

I know it's true, I'll never let you go!

All I do I'd do anything for you

Everything is in your hands

So I get up, Get up and Praise you!"

Hillsong -- Get Up and Praise You

Happy Hiatus!

The time out is doing me wonders, and I am not yet inclined to emerge from my shell. I have edited another two chapters of the novel, and there is a rosy glow in my cheeks from the walking and fresh air I am getting.   Last night I went to see the premiere of Sin City at Centro Cinema. It was a charity bash to raise funds for the cerebral palsy league and it was a lot of fun, doing the whole Hor's Douvres and champagne before the film, and then watching the film.   It is a rather dark comedy, and somewhat surreal. Not my usual thing, but since it was in the name of a very good cause, I don't begrudge the evening.   Some decisions have been reached about my life from here on out. I have many things to do, to write, and to say.   It is time to refocus, regroup, and move on.   "All changes, even the most longed for, have their melancholy; for what we leave behind us is a part of ourselves; we must die to one life before we can enter into another!" Anatole France.

It has been an age since I posted anything in this journal. In fact, I have neglected it, and my readers deplorably! I'm sorry for that. There are a few reasons why this has happened. First and foremost, in April, my Aunt passed away. Aunt Darling as we called her, (her name was Florence) was like another mother to me, which is why I refer to her son, Jeffrey as my brother. I spent many happy days at Darling's home when I was growing up, and her children were more like siblings to me than cousins.

Then, Annette went away on six weeks holiday to Europe and the UK during May-June and I was filling in for her while she enjoyed herself. Concurrently with that, I had a relationship with a wonderful, caring and sweet guy that I work with. It was a brief as it was fun, and I don't regret it. He and I remain very good friends, but we decided by mutual agreement just a few weeks ago, that we are really very much better friends than anything else. So, here it is, July already and not a word from me here in months.

I'll be honest, I have been moonlighting a lot at another diary site where I can keep my posts more private as I had a fair bit of stuff to work through surrounding my life in general and I didn't necessarily want the entire world reading about those things.

I've had some of the old health issues flare recently too and that has sapped a lot of my energy.

Anyway, just wanted to let you all know I AM still alive despite the grossly exaggerated rumours of late. and I will try to be less of a stranger around here!

Happy Writing!

Meg